Wes and I are in sunny farms today waiting to check out and next to us was an older man with bright blue eyes, a cool hat on, and an open kind face. He was looking at a family ahead of him with three kids and at Wes.
The man says:" Isnt it amazing how children can light up the face of any person no matter what their religion or culture is? I read the bible alot and in Matthew it says why. It says that each child has an angel assigned to him and that is why we are so attracted to babies because they are so close to their angels and to God-its almost like you can get a glimpse when you look at them."

His blue eyes twinkled and he walked away all light.
Wow....

Sweet and Lucky Seven

Oh Abs I can't believe you are seven. The time has flown- I remember so well how you learned to crawl around, not doing the classic crawl but the kind where you tucked one leg under and scooted. I wonder if Wes will crawl like you. You had a great birthday yesterday- opened presents first thing off in the morning and then got to pick a breakfast place to go with your Papa, all of us with the day off. Court, Cass and I met you on a run to the park and you joined us for part running on your long skinny legs even helping me push Wes in the jogger for part. You didn't stop moving or bouncing the WHOLE day, you were so excited. You and your Papa decorated the house and you helped clean, then 4 friends from 3 different schools came over for your Pet Shop party. You guys decorated bags with markers and puffy paint, played musical paws, but the best was just running around outside, up in the tree via the rope, and playing your make believe horse games. You love pet shops animals right now, build extravagant houses out of used boxes, paper plates and whatever you salvage from around the house, I am amazed at your inventiveness. You have had a lot of change this year, a new brother and a new school. You have been the best big sister EVER- I love how Wes does his talking/screaming voice the most for you, how his face lights up when he sees you first thing in the morning and when he hears your voice as he is trying to fall asleep he always turns his head to the door to see if he can catch a glimpse of your face before he goes to sleep. School has been an adjustment, you have been brave and have grown up so much. I watch you in class and I appreciate how aware you are of other kids, how kind you are and how you love to joke around and laugh. You like to do well, you love to do art of any kind, you love jumping rope, wearing mismatched knee high socks, to do your homework, and for us to read books to you. You still hate to sit and eat food but do complain less about what we are having. You usually do your own hair now and often pack your lunch for school.

Oh Abs I can't believe you are seven- you are going to have such a good year, I can't wait to watch.

hmmmm...

A good sign or a bad sign that i am eating Nutella straight out of the jar with a knife.

The Beach

Today i got to run in the misty rain to the beach and back. It was a stretch, my lungs and muscles balking for sure. I'm always amazed how quickly my mind says i can't do this, then i hear my running buddy Tess who's worlds away in New Zealand talking in my head, telling me to get my ass up the hill, that i can walk at the top if i need to. You made me laugh Tess and you weren't even here. Thanks girl for being you and for teaching me how to run. Miss you like crazy.

Journey

Poems about loss, writing that is in us and must come out.
Doesn't matter if people understand or appreciate it, a drive to articulate.
This life is a journey sometimes beautiful sometimes painfully dark- choosing to spend as much time in the light but not shy from the dark that quietly waits for you to cease doing ... to stop and pay attention.
Healing so complex and circuitous without a distinct end point but many points along the way ...the journey.

The Cascade

The thing about starting to run, is that it makes me sore.
The thing about being sore is that it makes me stretch.
The thing about stretching is that it makes me breathe.
And breathing simply makes me feel better. :)

Ahhh... one of my favorite things. Saturday mornings and a steaming cup of tea.

2010

A few things I will remember about being at La Push for New Years.
Getting out there in the dark, Wes' s first sight of La push New Years Eve all bundled up on a night walk on he beach with flashligts
The full moon coming in and out of sight as the clouds flew by making the beach both light and dark.
Giant trees tumbling around in the 20 ft. waves and seeing seafoam fly past the camper.
A fireworks show in true reservation style- Joe and I outside the camper watching, the kids asleep.
The nights of no sleep, Wes crying, Abby with a fever.
The sun coming out the third day and feeling my body's response- hear deep breath and see this girl smile.
Abby making up this song.
This is the way Wesy sleeps, wa-aa, wa-aa, wa-aa.
This is the way Abby sleeps, snore sound snore sound
This is the way that mama sleeps, "oh my gosh wes, oh my gosh wes"
This is the way that papa sleeps, " come on wes, come on wes."
And when asked about her new years goal for 2010 Abby's response
"To get myself back in Five Acre." (The school she used to go to the last few years)

This is life, the good and the bad all wrapped up in a crumpled yet beautiful package.

A few more- New Years Day 2010

Welcome 2010

Stormy La Push on New Years Day
















Abby knee deep in sea foam. It was so stormy and the tide so high there was actually foam blowing past the camper in the air.











Lil Wes all bundled up- he didn't mind cold la push at all- except at night when he thought it best to cry each time he woke up for awhile so no one but Abby could sleep. Walking a baby in a camper isn't actually that easy 5 steps, turn around, 5 steps turn around..... please Wes go to sleeeep!









Saturday the sun and blue sky come. We are exhausted from two nights of crying Wes and thought we would leave for home this day until the sun came and we just couldn't go...






Abs and I walking on the beach.

New Pics

So this boy LOVES the jump up. He will literally come out of the seat a little when he is jumping he is so enthusiastic about it. He especially loves it when everyone is looking right at him- a Leo for sure.







Abs and Wes on our Christmas tree cutting







I love this pic- wonder what he is thinking - "really, those are mine? look how they move. the next pic taken which isn't on here is him trying to eat those toes. :)










Hard to believe it is time for him to be sitting up by himself- he is still pretty tippy but likes it.


Tres Bebes - Wes, James Van and Mathilda Roo.


How sweet are they?

Abs and Wes in their Norwegian sweaters from their Grandpa Peep.





















Abs and Wes Christmas morning in their new pajamas!





























Christmas morning breaking ice on the horse water in jammies.















The morning opening




















Not a white Christmas but close- pretty frosty.

Getting closer to being ready.....
Tonight the Grinch and how Christmas still came dispite the lack of stuff, nice reminder to chill out!!
What exactly to put in a almost 5 month old's stocking hmmmm.......

Winter Solstice

To celebrate the return of the Sun.

To acknowledge the best and worst of the past year

and give voice to our hopes for the next.

Happy winter solstice and "Here Comes the Sun...."

At the breakfast table

Abby mutters sort of under her breath....." Someone has to know if Santa is real, I just have to know..."
This momma takes a deep breath and states, "Ok Abby, are you ready?"
Abs: Yep.
me: I talk about how it started that yes he WAS a real guy, how he did it and that there was definately magic involved but that that person died. Talked about traditions and how things evolved (simple version for sure) and about the spirit of christmas how fun it is to give gifts to people that we love.
Abs: Ok mama. That sounds ok to me.
Then she smiles and says "I definately know elves are real I just wasn't sure about Santa."
Such a sweetie girl.