Being Well

It has been since 2004 that I have been taking something
to either treat my cancer and make it stay away, once it was
in remission. I remember that term before I was intimately acquainted with cancer and thought it sounded so good and hopeful. Then, when I was going through treatment and after, no one said it. I kept waiting to hear you are in remission- it is gone. Until one day I asked my oncologist and she said, "oh yes, the cancer is in remission." It seemed so casual and unimportant, not the hopeful, triumphant ending I was fighting for. So now is the waiting game, where you lead a "normal" life and try not to think about it coming back. Where you are wracking your brain for what caused it so you won't repeat it. Environmental, emotional, bad genes, no one can tell you for sure, just keep your positive attitude. Right.... Most days I'm too busy to worry which is good but the day I decided not to refill my tamoxifen I felt nervous. We've been talking about it for months but when it came down to not making the trip to Costco that day I suddenly felt panicky inside. I've decided to stop taking the tamoxifen for now. It has been a week and a half and I feel great.

Things I Am Doing to be Well
-laugh, a lot.
-running or walking as many days as possible
-seeing the Naturopath
-Breathing deeply
-Crying
-Eating as organic as possible
-growing veggies and flowers
-drinking tea
-sleep when my body says I need to
-Love deeply
-surround myself with people that love me

"Often we must learn that we can be "well" without being cured." -Vickie Girard